Long Distance Relationship – How to have a successful long distance relationship
Casual long distance relationships are extremely common these days thanks to social media impacting every aspect of our lives and giving us unlimited access to people all over the world. They are also, in most cases, short lived, being based on fantasy and involving two peope who will probably tire of each other before getting a chance to meet in person. Serious long distance relationships, however, are a different matter entirely. They're real, and if you find yourself presented with the opportunity to get involved with someone special, and who thinks you are equally special, go for it. Don't let distance put an end to a special relationship before it's even started. Instead, follow these practical love tips to ensure a successful outcome.
Starting a Relationship
You might begin such a relationship on social media and progress to meeting in person, or, alternatively, you might begin the relationship due to a chance encounter with someone while, for example, one or both of you are on holiday and you strike up a holiday romance. The personal meeting is essential, and in the case of you first meeting up on social media, the sooner you get together in person, the better if the relationship is to stand any chance of success. That's simply because without meeting in person, you tend to form a mental impression of the other person based on how you'd like them to be. You're working with very limited information, so you fill in the blanks in a way that's not realistic, which is usually a recipe for disappointment.
Facing the Practicalities
Having met someone special in person and seriously entered into a romantic relationship that you'd like to continue and develop, it's time to look at the practicalities involved. How far apart do you live? If it's only a few hundred miles, it's not so difficult to find the time to meet up quite often, even if only for a weekend, and let the relationship follow its natural course. If, on the other hand, you live on the opposite side of the planet from your partner, as is often the case these days, many more things have to be considered.
These include the expense involved in travelling to meet each other, as well as being able to find the time to spend at least a couple of weeks together more than once a year. In addition, if you live in different countries, entry restrictions may apply, too, that further limit your access to each other. The difficulties are many and varied, but the good news is that they can be overcome if you see them as just temporary problems in search of a solution. If, on the other hand, you see them as insurmountable obstacles, then that's exactly what they'll become. You can find a few useful tips for having a long distance relationships at Lifehack.org.
Making your Relationship Work
A relationship that involves a long distance between you and your partner and long periods of separation needs a fair amount of work to keep it going, but if you're both committed to making it work, then it's not so much hard work as a labour of love. First you need to check your own commitment. Two well known phrases should always be kept in mind: “Absence makes the heart grow fonder” and “Out of sight, out of mind”.
Ask yourself which of those applies to you. If the first of those applies to both you and your partner, there's a much greater chance of maintaining the relationship and constantly making it stronger as you'll both always be looking for ways to be together. If either of you feels the second way, then you may as well come clean and part company as it's a relationship that's doomed to progress no further.
Show that you Care
A common mistake to avoid in the early stages of any romantic relationship is when you try too hard to impress your partner by boasting of your accomplishments. This need to impress stems from a lack of confidence in yourself, and it's not an attractive quality. Focus more on your partner's life and work, and look for mutual interests. That way, you come across as attractively modest, thoughtful and considerate. Make an effort to remember your partner's likes and dislikes and, of course, their birthday. If you forget that, it's the end of the road.
Control your Insecurities.
Spending so much time apart, it's natural for doubts and suspicions to creep in concerning your partner's commitment to keeping the relationship going. While you can always keep in touch by several methods such as phone calls, video chat and emails, you must be careful not to overdo it. If you come across to your partner as needy and clinging, there will indeed be doubts concerning his or her commitment, and you'll have nobody to blame but yourself because it's you who caused them by your needless insecurity. If you're looking for love tips to improve your chances of a successful relationship, then start by putting that one into practice. Keep your communication to the same level as your partner.
How do you Want your Relationship to Develop?
Keep an eye on the future. With both of you equally committed to each other, you can keep the relationship going indefinitely, but it will be far more rewarding if you work to eliminate the distance that has kept you apart. It can be done, and it gives you both a shared purpose with an end result that you both want and both deserve.